Everybody wants to be happy, and especially to have a happy relationship with the partner. At the beginning stages of the relationships, we are ready to do a lot of things to be loved, but so many things very often get forgotten during the routine daily life with time.
After some time, people wonder why relationships are not the same as they used to be. We were so happy together, so what happened to us now? Why he/she doesn’t love me anymore as he/she used to? You can have a lot of similar different questions, but all of them lead to one conclusion – your relationship is not as happy as it was in the past.
Of course, every couple has their own reasons and ways how they build their relationships and why their relationship had been changing over time. I would like to bring up some main rules which, if followed, will help you to keep your relationship with your partner happy and healthy.
1. Take care of each other every time.
If you decided to be together, so take care of each other in every situation, no matter for how long you have been together. A lot of people are used to take care of each other just when they are still newly married, or at the beginning of their relationship, and after some time they get used to each other, so they forget about taking care of each other like before.
What do I mean by taking care of each other?
Taking care of each other is to make some small surprises, spend some pleasant time, cook some delicious dinner, prepare some hot tea in winter, or anything that can make your “second half” happy and bring a smile on their face. Try to do something for which you would more probably receive a big “thank you”. Make each other’s day and life easier.
2. You receive what you give.
If you want to be loved – so love first. If you would like to have your partner as your best friend – be a good friend to your partner first. Try to show what is important to you, not just talk about it, but show it in your own example. You would like that your partner would take care of you – show him/her by taking care of him first, and you would expect to receive the same in return.
3. Work continuously on your relationship.
Your relationship was happy and both of you were happy with each other at the beginning of your relationship, just because both of you were working on it. Both of you were scared to lose each other, so you were showing the best sides of yourselves. Where did this disappear now? What has changed? Both of you are still the same two people who loved each other. I know what has changed with time. There are two main reasons: 1. you became a bit lazier; 2. you are offended by each other and you hide it and don’t talk about it. You don’t want to do any extra effort to work on the things which are already yours. If you are offended by your partner, or maybe even you are insulted on something, believe me, if you will continue keeping it inside, it will not become better with time. I would say, it will go deeper inside you and you will lose happiness and peace inside you, and at the end, it will be causing some illnesses. In result, your relationship gets worse and less happy. If you have something to say to your partner, say it now. Say it and try to figure out a solution together. The decision that is made by both of you will satisfy both of you in the relationship.
The work on your relationship should be continuous. If you have a partner, then now you are working to keep a happy relationship together. You are working to improve it and create happier memories together. Work on it daily. Daily work on your relationship gives you happiness first, and definitely for both of you as a couple as well.
4. Never ask to have a place in somebody’s life.
If a person wants to be with you, he/she will find time and ways to be together. Don’t believe it if somebody says that he/she wants to be together with you, but you don’t see any action from his/her side to proof it. Try to find the real reason.
5. Happiness is inside you
If you are not happy with yourself, how do you want to build a happy relationship with your partner? If you think that you will become happy when you will have a good boyfriend/girlfriend or spouse then you are mistaken. Learn to be happy with yourself first, otherwise, you will have much more problems than before. Nobody in this world will make you happy. Work for your own happiness, try to find it in your life now. Think which things or activities make you happy and try to spend more time doing them. Feel happiness and you will attract more positive emotions and happiness around.
6. Forgiveness is one of the main keys to a happy relationship.
It is impossible to live our life without making mistakes. You make mistakes, I make mistakes, your partner does, everyone does… How often do you make mistakes? What do you learn from them? Do you repeat the same mistakes or not? Do you have the will to ask for forgiveness and to forgive others?
To forgive means to put behind, feel free, do whatever is possible so you do not repeat the same mistake again, don’t leave room for any negative energy to stay between both of you. Of course, I am talking about mistakes that can be forgiven and can be put behind. Some big mistakes can be very dangerous for the relationship in the future, make sure to avoid these.
7. Avoid arguing with your partner when you’re angry.
When you are angry, you can say a lot of things that you truly don’t mean. You can hurt or insult your partner deep in the heart and it will be so hard to ask for forgiveness. Anyways, it will not bring any positive influence to your relationship. It is much better to try to go for a talk with your partner and to discuss the situation like adults. Try to show your point of view in a particular situation, and try to calmly find a solution that works the best for both of you.
8. One nice word can help making a relationship stronger.
We should respect every minute of our life. Today you are younger than tomorrow, today you are spending time with your loved one. You never know how tomorrow can be. You never know what can happen in the future. Try to live your life in a way that, if something bad happens (I hope not, but life is unpredictable), you will not regret that you didn’t say something nice to your partner like “I love you”. Sometimes just one simple smile or one single word can make a better mood and a better day. Just be nice to each other.
9. Travel together.
During your travels, you live your dream life. You are not working, you see new places, countries, cities, cultures, people… I can say a lot of good and positive things about traveling. One time, one person told me that, during a travel, you discover the reality of the person with whom you are traveling. I totally agree with it. Usually, people do not travel too often, so when they do, they want to get the maximum out of it. You can see your loved one as a totally different person when you travel together. During travels, you create memories together, you experience a different lifestyle in a new place. It makes your relationship much stronger.
10. Have friends with the same interests as both of you.
If you are together, it means you have a lot of things in common. I hope you have some interests and hobbies which you both enjoy. But for sure, each one of you is a different and unique person, so you definitely can have some interests which are not interesting for your partner, and this is very normal. What about friends that you both spend time with? You definitely have to have common interests with them so you can enjoy spending time together. If you don’t enjoy spending time with your partner’s friends for any reason, talk to your partner and try to solve this problem together, maybe try to find new friends with whom it would be interesting to hang out for both of you. Believe me, it is a very important topic. Talk about it and try to find a smart solution in this situation. However, keep in mind that, some of your partner’s friends were his close friends before you came into your partner’s life, and they have so many interests in common, so you can’t simply and easily push your partner to give up all his old friends just because you didn’t like spending time with them.
I am sure you would like to be in a happy relationship. If not, I don’t see any reason to continue the relationship with the same person. It is your life, try to do whatever makes you happy. Your health depends on your happiness. If you would really like to have a happy relationship, believe me, these main rules will help you to have it. They will help you to see where you should work more and where you should pay more attention. I wish you to have a very happy relationship! I wish you to be happy!
If you have any additional input, or if you have anything you would like to discuss, please feel free to write me in the comments below.